Track 10: Love is a pain Toni.
2016/ Love is a pain/ I cannot always tolerate/ Although I am/ still here/ alive/ a life/ this life/ this love/ this pain/ goes past niavete/ into solace/ and I still thrive on change/ I am still/ and I moniter these mass fluctionations/ hysteria/ is it the wave or the tide/ the moon/ or the earths movements/ our relations are personal/ like this painful love/ from which you wish to depart/ making the choice you say you don’t want/ you fulfill yourself with your actions/ mechanical beast/ when I haven’t written for days and it all slides by/ everything I thought was forgotten/ it passes unnoticed/ how conscious am i?/ my behavior/ if I cannot recognize or remember what I have done first hand/ though it appears in a list of fragmented moments/ will I remember having written these words?/ each letter?/ each thought or feeling driving this lost experience?/ my existence is null/ my importance is lost/ my ideas are gone with the distractions of the outside world/ everything that seems so important has subconsciously or unconsciously brought me here/ all moments which I take responsibility for/ whether I want to recognize that/ I found it easier to do so with love when I stop judging myself and am honest/ and here I write to let go/ to remind myself later or now/ if I can be here/ if I can truly/ be/ here.